Im both in and out

Have you ever been in a rut?

Been in a spot that makes you both and equally laugh and cry? A place where you love and hate the circumstance? A place that leaves you in the dark yet you have access to light? It didn’t help that the gentleman I was with gave me butterflies that fluttered in my stomach to last me a life time.
Well that is definitely where I have been in some days of my life. I was in a place where I am joyous and sad- at the same time. A place where I couldn’t decide whether I wanted to or not. It got so bad that even though on the outside I was cool as a cucumber, my ulcers showed me flames- literally. They exposed the war between my heart and my mind. Even in the exhibition of turmaoil, the lines in between weren’t read.

Let’s just say I took all my power and gave it to my heart and said, “Where you lead I will follow” and that’s exactly what I did... or did I?

- 27 Feb 2011