Looking at my life through a rear-view mirror!

One of my BTM... I love life!

One of my best Starter Moment in 2011(Biker Mice)

Apart for my secret love for bikes, I thought that the bikers looked totally cool in their attire. Everyone caught up in a euphoria of speed and excitement. It was a proper good day for me. Not only was I meeting with my best friend from high-school- who i last saw in 2004, but my long time crush (who is my friend now) was there too.

I couldn't believe my eyes. I think there was a moment where I thought- I am home. this is who I am and I love such things. It took me back to a time where I was dating Sean from Swaziland and the Bike Rallies we would attend. Sleep under some tree for shelter, I would turn his 'Never-wash_a-bikers-jacket' into a blanket, then recall all those times I told him I would never touch it because it was a hub for bacteria LOL! Then we would travel by faith and hope we get a store where we can get food. For me life doesn't get better than this. This is the vagabond life I like and it is what makes me!

You know how the music you play in a good moment attaches itself to your memory, well the song of the day was Wiz Khalifa- 'Black and Yellow.
Now that song always used to sound bubble gum rap like to me, thanx to my underground ear. But I swear that day the damn song was relevant and sounded too good. LOL! So every time I hear it or see The Biker Mouse, the Nostalgia triggers a smile on my face. And yes it is the reason that song is my ring tone... caught the moment below!

# Now Playing

Wow, Spent the whole morning playing Zion I and they are on repeat.

Its so weird how everytime I need a pick me up, hip hop does it for me. But i am not talking Lil Wayne Hip Hop. I am talking old school under-groung conscious and positive stuff!

On my speakers now is Zion I- Doing my Thing (True and Livin)

The kind of man Zoe wants

I stayed up all night jotting down a beautifully inspired blog on what are the key elements on the kind of guy i like. Letting people in my head and explaining the intricate details of what attracts me to certain men, but the blog got deleted just as i was bout to save it. I felt like crying, but then i again I thought its not meant to be. So i will share the pointers i was dealing in depth on. This is what i wanmt in a man, these are my main attractions, even when i meet u for the first time these things should pop out for me.

1. A man with a plan

2. A man of vision

3. A man comfortable in his own skin

4. A leader, naturally so. One with a huge ego that i must stroke and maintain.

5. A man who will leave a legacy behind.

I so wish you could've seen what i wrote, i am pretty sure u would have loved it and it would've piqued your interest, but unfortunately its too late into the night for me to delve in there again. My mind is tired. I will take time out to write it again some day. But for now, this is the synopsis of the guy who will steal my heart. *it could be you, as you reading this*

"Termination is a quick temporary solution...with permanent consequences...and like i said Guess God knew this child before he or she was formed so who am i? I would rather put up with judgement from man and work on fixing myself as umama..."

-Kelly Northon* (One of my closest, wise friends)

As much as I am christian and SDA nogal, I do suffer having a lack of faith. My friend and I were having a discusion about falling pregnant and since we are 25years and have a plan for our lives, we could'nt afford having babies.
But the question obviously popped up, that what if you were to fall pregnant without you having to actually plan it? In my personal capacity, I told her, I dont know if I would be brave enough to keep nor terminate. But now a woman of my faith and understanding- i bshouldnt even be debating this. I am just suppose to accept my fate and not even consider terminating the baby. But honestly, that thought crosses my mind more than once. I honestly don't know what I will decide.

Then I refered the question to her: and the quote above is what she told me. That definately shifted my mind set- and changed my whole life. but what she said, I am definately goingto keep the baby under any harsh circumstance.
But I would like to add to her answer (Which I turned into a quote):

'Termination is a quick temporary solution...with permanent consequences...and like i said Guess God knew this child before he or she was formed so who am i? I would rather put up with judgement from man and work on fixing myself as umama... than from God and be deemed a murderer!" -Kunoichi and Kelly Northon*


P.S. *Changed my friends identity for her protection

Can I just cry!

Today i feel like crying and crying the whole day.


I really dont know exactly why I am cryng or what it will accomplish. But I think I wont feel better till I let it out- let it all out! At this point i want to be held and told everything will be ok! Please dont ask me what's wrong because I don't know. I Dont wanna be judged! Dont want to be cross questioned! I just wanna be hugged!

#Just one of them days!

2011- look through my eyes

This is what I see now! As I am 3 days from Turning a quarter Century...